Judging and staying happy.

 Let’s be honest, we make judgements all the time.

Judging, discriminating, discerning, valuing are all part of learning and evolving. But we make the mistake of confusing conventional reality with ultimate reality. On the ultimate level is there no judgement, as there is no judge and no thing to be judged. There is just mirror-like awareness.

 At a conventional level, our judgements may be objective or subjective. Objective would be…“Is this hotter than that?” or “That looks more green,” or“That person seems tense.”

It is something that others could agree on.

 At a subjective level, our judgements may be “I don’t like that,”… “I want this!”… “I don’t care.”

This is a personal opinion, based on our backgrounds and influences, and we will rarely agree!

This is how we run our usual lives, and of course, it creates much suffering, and it keeps us in a prison of this vicious cyclic existence… going up and down all the time.

 The question is, “Does this subjective judgement effect our natural happiness?”

 Our natural happiness is open compassionate space. That is absolute truth.

Whatever appears in the mind is a relative truth: it is to do with our embodied human existence. We live in a relative world, and so we definitely have to make judgements (some things are beneficial to our health, and some are not!)

 In Sanskrit, any appearance in the mind is called a ‘Nyam’.

 Now we come to judging others.

If we fall into merely judging – or blaming – others, because of our own bias and fixated ideas, we will obscure our own mind and we will and become unhappy. Unless we have a large, clear picture of someone else’s background and motivations, we cannot form a clear opinion about their actions…let alone gossip about them! All we can do is be aware of that person’s tendencies. For example, we can be aware that they may exaggerate.

 This is integrating absolute truth and relative truth. What we do about it is…tricky! We can try to bring about balance, or remain silent. Adding to the problem…merely adds to the problem, and we find ourselves getting sucked in a “Nyam”.

 We make judgements from differing levels of clarity: there are coarse, subtle and very subtle levels. The coarse is connected to the physical world, the subtle to the mind and the very subtle to our essence.

 The more the refinement, the bigger the picture. Sometimes we have to evaluate a situation, whereas at other times, it’s right to let be. If an evaluation can create space, then that is positive.

Zen koans are meant to do that – putting the mind into neutral (this relates to the enlightened activities of pacifying, magnetising, enriching or destroying ego created situations – see the essay Wisdoms and Demons).

 Judging takes skill. Sometimes we get it wrong, and so we learn. If we keep making the same mistake and getting the same reactions, then we have become a fixated personality.

 However, we can use the relative levels to peel away our fixated ideas and understand the ultimate level…that is why we are here! Saying all that, we do seem to have preferences – I have a fondness for grilled tomatoes on toast!

 We are beautiful tools,

Tony