Confidence And Lack of Confidence

This is a difficult subject to read and to write about.

There are two ways of looking at confidence, one from a practitioner’s point of view (someone who is aware of consciousness) and the other from non-practitioner’s point of view (someone who isn’t aware of consciousness). One focuses on the seeing, while the other focuses on whatever is seen.

We can be confident that perception takes place through the senses. 
We can be confident that awareness of this perception is present, and therefore consciousness is present; this is the knowingness before anything is known. 

A practitioner realises that this consciousness is, in essence, pure and without bias, and is what we are. We are not the collection of responses in the mind.

Here, we have to be aware of the different viewpoints of practitioners and non-practitioners. 
To ordinary people, whatever is seen is important; through our memories and programming, we believe that we ‘know’, and that fixation leads to emotional responses. 

To a practitioner, it is the unaffected seeing without fixations that is important. The question, “What is this?” is our first response, as we’re not relying on memories at that moment.

The confidence that is acquired from achievements and social interactions shores up the ego. While we may do great things, beautiful things, there is a vulnerability present; we can become emotional and protective, and even aggressive if this false confidence is challenged – even with a look 🙂

There is, however, a natural, innate confidence which is unshakeable when pure perception is recognised. It is present in everyone but becomes obscured by confusion, doubt and fear, and so we turn to learned confidence to try and boost our feeling of wellbeing; this is unsustainable.

As a practitioner, we can lack confidence in voicing this pure view, as it cannot be expressed. 

I have only once in my life come across someone who expressed knowingness without speaking. He entered the room and sat; there was no charisma about him … just silent, confident awareness. Speaking didn’t add anything – there was a sense of no self-identity present, and it wasn’t an act.