To ego or not to ego?!

For years, I’ve had a problem with western spirituality, especially in Buddhism. When at retreats, people walk around as if ‘they’ are not there, head to one side and slightly vacant. How did we get to that state? I once actually put a sign up on the notice board saying, “A silent retreat doesn’t mean you are a Zombie!”

People adopt an air and become insular, separating themselves off from humanity, compassion and…fun! Humans are constantly fitting themselves into a state, and are in danger of falling into a group mind set, and leaving our brains outside.

We are unique individuals with egos. It is a matter of how to work with this ego that can either free us, or keep us enslaved. The ego is the mud!

If we are practising in a cave on our own, then there is no point to ego. Ego is consciousness clinging to an identity. However, in order to function in society as a good, healthy human being, we need a little ego…it’s fun.

If ego clinging takes over our being, then we are off with the fairies, totally controlled by mental images and concepts. If we deny ego, we are still in a fantasy world, controlled by mental images and concepts!

 When ego clinging takes over

we become lost and confused.

Above all,

we lack love.

Likewise,

if we pretend we have no ego,

we become lost and confused.

Above all,

we lack love.

We need a ‘mere I’ to function with others, to be playful. However, we have to know the difference between resting in essence (no ego) and expression essence (playful ego). It’s the expression that reveals love, empathy and compassion.

To put others at ease, we have to act a little (“No! Your bum doesn’t look too big in that!”) We just don’t have to believe that our act is a permanent fixture. In acting, we are playing a part for another’s benefit, not separating ourselves so we cannot be contaminated. Love is fearless: Chogyam Trungpa coined the phrase “Spiritual Warrior”.

All I’m saying is, smile more – and mean it. Don’t lose your humanity! It’s very precious. And above all, be welcoming.

Love is not puffed up:-

Corinthians

Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not love, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.

And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not love, I am nothing.

And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not love, it profit me nothing.

Love suffer long, and is kind; love envy not; love vaunt not itself, is not puffed up,

Does not behave itself unseemly, seek not her own, is not easily provoked, think no evil;

Rejoice not in iniquity, but rejoice in the truth; Bear all things, believe all things, hope for all things, endure all things.

Love never fails: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.

For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.

When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.