Do You Feel You Are Not Good Enough?
This feeling can be disheartening, and can have an effect on whatever we do. Unfortunately, it also delays the realisation of our natural birthright of enlightened potential – and sanity :D. Being half-hearted clouds clarity, when we already have all that we need to succeed in realising our goal – whatever that goal might be – and that is awareness.
The feeling of not being good enough can give rise to all sorts of unnecessary negative emotions, which we then justify. That is delusion. That is the cause of our suffering. We simply lack confidence in the essential simplicity of a subject.
This feeling is even more evident when we are talking about spirituality and spiritual establishments or traditions. It’s quite understandable that such a feeling might arise: there are so many ‘good’ people, ‘scholarly’ people, ‘holy’ people, that we don’t have chance to keep up with them. It is as if we have to sign on the dotted line, and never look at anything else ever again. It happens.
Once we are hooked into others’ enthusiasm, we become fundamentalists, leaving our humanity at the door. The problem with learning ‘about’ something is that we feel that we are superior, and act in a superior way. It happens.
Modifying our manner does not mean that we are spiritual: we’ve just become something that we are not. Mannerisms become a weight around our neck. If we fall into that trap, we will never feel that we are good enough, and will be critical of others as a result. It happens.
It is not a question of being aware of how we act. It’s about the awareness itself. Being taught something is an introduction: it gives us a way in, so that we can have our selfie taken at the door to the path … Big smile! Big pout! But we only actually pass through the door and set foot on the path when we let everything go and just be ourselves, warts and all. People fear being honest: they feel vulnerable, and that’s why they stay outside, despite believing that they are inside.
For those of us who aren’t ‘good enough’, experiencing all those doubts, uncertainties, confusion and dissatisfaction is, in fact, the path. It is these very qualities that keep us looking, rather than ‘finding’ something to do, or talk about.
The feeling of being ‘not good enough’ is disheartening, but with it comes the realisation that that is the way we are at this moment. In that, everything drops away and there is a sense of relief and release. That is honest openness – and it’s good enough.